Well, saturday night. Garry is over now, he’s on the couch watching the hockey game.

So, where to start….Yesterday was an insane day. First of all, my mom had surgery yesterday. I got there at 7:30 and got to see her before she went to the OR. Her and my dad went and my brother and I sat and waited for a bit. So then we move to the waiting area. We get the couch cause we are going to be there for 8+ hours. So surgery was supposed to start at 8am, and they were inserting a scope to try and get a better look at her liver and surrounding areas to see if there was further cancer that the CT scan couldn’t see. So by 10-11:00, we are sure surgery is underway because if they decided not to remove the liver tumours, I’m sure we would know by now. So I called my aunt (Dad’s sister) and let her know what is happening (nothing) and that I’m sure they are doing the surgery. My brother gets up and goes for a walk.

And then about 10 minutes later, the surgeon walks into the waiting area. Not good. It is about 11:30am now. She is not supposed to be here. She is supposed to be operating on my mother. So my dad and I go in the little room, and she tells us that unfortunately they are not going to operate because the cancer is just too spread on the liver and bascially there is just no point in doing the surgery and no good would come from it. She HAS to leave some liver there and there is just no liver to leave that isn’t diseased. Unfortunately, there was a lot of scar tissue where she tried to insert the scope, and had to do a pretty big incision, so she is in a lot of pain.

So yeah…that’s what happened. Even though we knew this was maybe a possibility….it’s pretty awful…So what this means is that her cancer cannot be cured. It can Maybe be controlled with chemo. Bascially we don’t have a clue as to what will happen, or how she will react to the chemo. She may have 12 years. She may have 2. We just don’t know. I am all calm now as I’m writing this, but it’s nuts. Yesterday I bascially cried hard on and off for 9 hours.

So this wasnt traumatic enough…go back a few days and my very close friend Miranda is 7 months pregnant. She gets admitted after a routine appointment Tuesday. Apparently her blood pressure was very high and she is toxemic. So. during an ultrasound, they thought the baby wasn’t moving. They sent her right away to a more “advanced” hospital a few cities away. So we’re all freaking out but everyone assures us, mom and baby are okay. She will be on bed rest and Miranda tells me that they probably will take the baby in a few weeks.

I get home last night and check my messages, and theres a message from her mom. “We Have a GIRL!” Im like WHAT???????? Apparently, they did a section at 11:00am because her bp was still high. I had no idea. I’m still in shock. She is 2 months premature and little. 3lbs, 3oz. I saw her today and she looks perfect. She’s breathing on her own. She’s just miniature! I have some pics. I’ll put some up Monday. So they named her Kyleigh. As soon as I heard I wanted to call my mom right away.

Im going to see her tomorrow, so I made sure I got lots of pics of Kyleigh to show her. I told my dad to tell her about the baby. She will be so surprised. Something kinda ironic I though. The doctor came and told us about my mom at the same time Kyleigh was being born. Might be nothing, but that’s strange. When my mom was out of recovery and in her room, the first thing she asked me about was had I heard anything about Miranda.

So that said. I’ve managed to lose 4 pounds since last week. I stand on the scale backwards. I don’t want to know how much I weight right now, but Amy says I’m close to the 170’s. I just want to know the loss or gain.

Okay enough typing for today……its been a crazy weekend. I couldnt sleep last night. I was up at 5:30 and I can ALWAYS sleep, so I know I’m “thinking”. It was hard to see my mom is so much pain. I’ll never get used to me mothering her. I can’t believe I’m 28 and so attached to her. So anyway. I think it might be an early night tonight. I’m getting tired.

7 thoughts on “

  1. Hi Jackie,

    I have been visiting your site on a regular basis for a year or two, but usually never leave any comments. After your entry today I felt compelled to leave a message. I’m very sorry to hear about your mother having cancer and that the doctors were unable to remove part of her liver. Stay strong! You and your family will be in my prayers.


  2. I am so sorry about your mom! I dont want to sound naive or stupid but is a transplant at all a possibility?! I just cant imagine your pain.

    I am saying a prayer for your friends baby but as the mom of 2 preemies I can assure you…..everything will be a-okay! One of mine was also a 32 weeker so I am familiar and when you wrote that Kyleigh’s off of air already??! Amazing! Oh and my other preemie…is a competitive gymnast right now. They always say that preemies end up being stronger people for their entire lives!

  3. I’ve experienced a similar situation with my own mother so I know where you’re at. Hang in there. Take care of yourself. You’re in my thoughts.

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