I just turned on the video camera on my computer and was going to do a vlog. I felt like I looked kinda cute, but when I saw myself, I thought, nope, I’m not doing it. It’s weird. This weekend I’m meeting some girl for the annual Xmas dinner at a steakhouse. Just last year they were all telling me how good I looked. I was 200 lbs. Now, at 287, I’m so embarrased to be seen. It’s SO embarrasing. But I will go, and get through it. Staying on plan will be challenging but life is full of dinners out, right?

Today I weighed in for week #1. I was down 4 pounds. I’m happy, but I can’t help but compare this week to every other week 1 I have ever done. On Kathy’s plan week 1 is usually about 6-7 pounds. WW is not Kathy’s plan. Much more processed food but with the new plan coming out will hopefully help to eliminate a little bit. (For us canadians the plan comes out next Monday). I just can’t do the other plans anymore. I can’t starve myself for 4 days again hoping to detox. I’m not there, not right now anyway. It’s a slight miracle I got through 1 week of WW!

I was also thinking about joining the local Goodlife gym around me. Sunday I took a stroll around and really liked it. I’m nervous of the cost though. I am spending now 50$ on WW, and another 60$ will be added. Marc suggested I try to do my own thing a few months until I am about 2 month into WW, and then if all is well, make the investment then. I think I will do that. For me, I can work out every day. If I’m not watching what I eat, I will lose no weight.

So I’m still not feeling great about myself. I still feel like I look huge to everyone. If equestrian apparel were in fashion for general public clothes that would hide my fat thighs nicely. It is just so overwhelming knowing I have like 120 pounds to lose. But I suppose I shouldn’t think about that. I’d be happy with 60 pounds off. I like my thinner face SO much more than this one.

Just a journey. I know you all can relate. Have a great night!

5 thoughts on “Hello!

  1. i live in the states, got the new plan at WW today…it’s much more flexible. and for someone like me who hates tracking they do have an option for that…which i’ll be checking into next week. first, i’m going to try this week being good about tracking.

    good luck…hang in there. and right now, say something nice to yourself. :)

  2. Four pounds is awesome! I know I posted on your blog weeks ago about checking out the new WW plan. I haven’t – you did. I weigh the same (or more), you’re down 4 pounds and have a plan. You should be proud of yourself (and I should get my butt in gear)!

    Good luck with Week 2!

  3. You’re going to do awesome ! I’m so proud of you and am thinking of doing the same thing this week – :)
    Thank you for the inspiration !

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